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Authored by CEO, Andria P. Harris, our blog is also a very important way of letting you know how we feel about what we do. For more dialogue on living with Dementia and Alzheimer's, be sure to follow us on Facebook and Twitter.


A Care Giver's Diary 

She Forgets...........but He Remembers!

 

I see love, I see fear, I see confusion, shock, gremlins of agony even though he tries to smile............

Melinda, he said, its time for bed

Well, why do I have to do that? Why are you here? Why am I here.......?

Come with me Melinda, lets lie down together

"Oh no, no, no, you go no....I don't know why you do that, you go on.......!"

Melinda sat on the green pine seat chair by the window overlooking the only flower garden in Brook Hill View Assisted Living Home. She had a pleasant day so far and her husband would rather it remain that way, so he walked away and sat on the other side of the window on the other green pine seat chair.

What were they looking at? Could it be the solitary garden with a few wondering crows pecking away at the freshly cut grass as the fountain flowed, gently roaring?

No body knew exactly what they were thinking, but I could see the lines of agony and pain swelled along the corner of his mouth. She is his wife and companion of fifty years, yet, that day she didn't know him. 

She stared at him as if he was an intruder and someone to be feared, someone to be terrified of. 

He look at her with tear filled eyes and wrinkled brow and said, "Honey I love you so!"

"Oh, but who is that, could she be my mother?

"No Melinda, she is not your mother"

"You bet she is!"

They sat side by side until it was past bed time, as Melinda started to drift off  softly asleep. He sat there by her side, but did not bother to awaken her. She too sat with hung head and shrug down shoulders and whispered tiny whips of  air as she snored.

Melinda gently opened her eyes after about twenty minutes and asked,  "Who are you?" "Did she come over?" "She told me she was on her way?" " Who are you?"

"I am your husband Timothy"

"Who? Flimoty?"

"Okay lets got to bed dear."

"I'm coming........I'm coming............I'm coming........"

Timothy took his wife's hand and they walked slowly  to the bedroom where they sleep for more that forty years. As he tucked her in, I noticed, sad tears, sad and lovely tears. He was lonely, but he never forget the substance, the worth of his wife. The woman who does not know him any more, but whom he will never forget.

"Bess your heart my darling" he said as he watched her drift off again in silence. 

"I wonder if she dreams" he remarked.